Oh mister tangerine man... - Premcorrespondent

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So much for a world cup that was more Jordi Cruyff than Johnan. Mismatched games, stars falling short of expectations and frustrating tactics made much of it interesting rather than thrilling.

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And so to the Premier League. Or Premiership; whichever of the two they are calling the first division these days.

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Off I went to Wigan to watch my once beloved Blackpool. Saturday night out there after a game; that’s something to savour. I hope modern top flight fans don't stick their noses up at the old town and instead enjoy some good old-fashioned fun. There’s nothing quite like boozing it up on the beach and eating greasy chips off the cold thighs of local trollops in the North West.

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Oh to be young and in love with the legend of a club that gave us so much Stanley Matthews magic. Of course this game was in Wigan and my days of winning round free and easy floozies are long behind me. Especially after that incident with my third wife all those years ago. But it seems the good old days are back, if only for one great away match. A very comfortable 4-0 win was a tangerine masterclass of hard work and common sense football. Wigan should learn how to punt if they want to stay up again this year.

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It was a weekend for lessons. Drogba decided repetition was the best way to make his points stick. He scored three while Chelsea got six. West Brom look like they’ll go down easier than Peter Crouch’s hooker did but at least they keep coming back and trying again in the hope they won’t flunk out this time.

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Manchestarabia were taught a lesson too. They just about held out at 0-0 at White Hart Lane but they got away with a mauling from a side that looked as tasty as fry-up after a night on the sauce. Gomes could have stayed home for all the work he had to do. Unless they sign Lady Luck next, this sort of performance won’t deliver the trophies some Arab state bought the Sky Blues for.

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Not that it was all bad for City. They did at least get lucky. Hart played very well too. And they did display some smart English grit, kicking the players who made them look like overpaid wannabes. Modric will be especially bruised today.

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Arsenal learned the price they should charge Barca for their beloved captain this weekend. And that price is nothing. Zip. Just a simple thanks but no thanks. Liverpool are hardly a class act again yet, but were it not for a rare Reina screw-up Arsenal would have got the defeat their lack of creativity deserved.

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Passing the ball about is nice and pretty but some one has to do something with it. If that man is Fabregas then without him they looked bereft. That said, 1-1 at Anfield may yet prove a good result if Hodgeson has his way with his team.

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In the Midlands Villa coped very well with the unexpected loss of their gaffa. A walkover saw them score three against West Ham who have apparently not got over the arrival of Grant. Old Bobby would have turned in his grave at such shambolic defending as Petrov, Downing and the outgoing Milner scored all too easily.

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Just down the road the two sides no one likes to play but everyone expects to beat gave the crowd a thrilling home win. Stoke fought back well from 2-0 down to 2-1 but couldn’t keep it going. In the end Wolves were determined and even ambitious, going close to a third and fourth late on.

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And in the games no one much noticed, Everton lost away to Blackburn, Sunderland and Birmingham shared the points, and Bolton drew 0-0 with Fulham.