Ninety-Nine quid well spent! - PremCorrespondent

I've just been on Ebay and spent the most gratifying £99 I've blown since that night in 1972 when I bumped into half the [Ed. Never gonna happen!] team on their way into Miss Lightlegs' Parlour on Colchester's infamous Redman Street.

That's right! I've just bought my very own special edition commemorative Munich Disaster scarf memorabilia pack. Seeing it listed on there took me way back to that morning Edwards flicked up a ball on the training ground - glanced me a look - and blasted it at me to make me drop my pie. The Bastard!

The scummy prawn sandwich muncher with no sense of heritage who was selling it now has to give me his address for the cheque. And Dave the Knife has been itching to pay me back for pointing him towards Colchester for a while.

Whether Dave does the business or not, at least the scum selling their scarves watched an abysmal defeat to a side that last week were creamed easily by champions-elect Arsenal. And to think, most of the players on the pitch weren't even conceived when City last did the league double over United.

Sticking with conception, wives across the country were given an early Valentine present when millions of men turned off the Chelsea Liverpool bore draw half way through and asked instead if there was anything needed doing round the house.

And with the competition holding the door open for them, Arsenal destroyed a very poor Blackburn side 2-0 to take a firm grip of the shiny silver pot toped by a small golden crown. Granted 2-0 hardly sounds like a thrashing. But this one was and should have better embarrassed Rovers than their defeat to the same opponents' second string in the League Cup a few weeks back.

That poor Chelsea draw probably gave a boost to the other corner of North London too. Three goals in the last half hour saw Spurs claim three away points that even the remaining Busby Babes could still take if they needed them.

That's right. The only team outside the big three that might win something this season played Derby in a meaningless warm up ahead of two Uefa Cup games and a League Cup final. Under Ramos Spurs are better than Liverpool, and with Chelsea looking tired that three to one bet I took might yet pay off.

Of course another team better than Liverpool under their less new manager is Aston Villa.

Now I'll admit that I spat brandy across the pub when Kevin's plucky Magpies took an early lead - away from home – and through Michael Owen of all people. But there was never any doubt a defence that has worsened since sacking Titus Bramble would be overwhelmed.

So when Carew finished off his hat trick no one could deny the big man his accolade as Martin O'Neil's new Emile Heskey. No one except Joey Barton perhaps, who seemingly punched Shaun Maloney whilst out on bail awaiting trial for another violent assault.

Sticking with sides better than Liverpool, and granted this theme could last a while these days, Everton managed to go one better than their lower profile neighbours this week.

That's right. While Liverpool played out bore draw, Everton played an even more yawn inducing 1-0 win against Reading, whose form of late must offer the Toon Army some hope that Newcastle will remain in top flight for next season.

Of course hope is hard to foster at St James’ Park when sides like West Ham have already put their season into cruise control.

Like Spurs, Birmingham City have improved under their new manager. They have become better organised, more resilient, and a little sneaky when dealing with the ref. So when the Hammers didn’t finish the job with a follow up to their excellent opener, it was only a matter of time before a Lucas Neil special was rightly punished with a penalty to give the likely relegation survivors a valuable point.

Adding to the Newcastle gloom, Middlesbrough became the highest placed North East team as a 1-0 win against an increasingly adrift Fulham took them up to 12th. And Sunderland won a fourth consecutive home game putting them 14th, and just two points off the plummeting black and white stone, though they were largely outplayed by Wigan.

Oh, and on top of all that, Portsmouth scored a ludicrously offside goal to take an ill-deserved three points from the Reebok in a game that saw England Number One David James put in a man of the match performance.